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All tweets by @candeychaney (page 5 of 38)
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#MyPreWorkOutRoutine I just push myself to do it every time, but I like the results. What an inner battle it is!
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my nasal drops in other way I'll choke #PackedForATrip
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Condoms #PackedForATrip
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How are the children like cellphones? If you can't find them more than for several days they are likely to be dead #PackedForATrip
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I’m always #PackedForATrip! the end is near
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Meditation #MyPreWorkOutRoutine
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#PackedForATrip and waiting for taxi
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There are always people who think about you: tax collectors, drug task force and your perverted neighbor #PackedForATrip
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#MyPreWorkOutRoutine taking selfies
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#MyPreWorkOutRoutine laughing
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#InKindergartenILearned to NEVER take a shit at school. Ever! Everyone just climbs up the adjoining cubicles to laugh at you. No escape
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#InKindergartenILearned that if you have to pee and you're too scared to ask the teacher to go, you will pee your pants.
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If you really piss them off, they will squeeze your junk off. #AFunFactAboutVaginas
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#InKindergartenILearned that the alphabet included the letters "L, M, N, O" and not just one letter called "elemino."
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OH I OFFENDED YOU WITH MY OPINION? You should hear the ones I keep to myself.
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They are like a dark cave of mysterious wonders. #AFunFactAboutVaginas
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#NotSureYouRealizeThat you're amazing just the way you are
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#NotSureYouRealizeThat you're my friend and nothing more
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#IGotNobelPrizeFor my economic system where I earn less than I spend
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#IGotNobelPrizeFor not trying to ruin peace
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#HaventWeAllSeenEnough of MILEY MOTHERFUCKIN CYRUS?!?! Go away, dumbass!
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.@Traceyny that was a perfect game. It started when my plane took off and ended when it landed and was entertaining along the way
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My fantasy football team is so bad, I tied my opponent this week. His name is BYE.
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