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1,025 tweets using #IfIWereTedCruz (page 28 of 35)
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#IfIWereTedCruz I'd watch this video, start a new party, and say #AlwaysChrist https://t.co/MyEohOU7IM @tedcruz
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#IfIWereTedCruz I would look like blobfish� I don't want to���
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#IfIWereTedCruz I'd Get In My Classic Cadillac And Just Drive It Right Off The Cliff.
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#IfIWereTedCruz I'd be on the phone this morning talking to Hillary about being her running mate.
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#IfIWereTedCruz I will first win local fancy dress competition for age group under 10. Then I will see my chances in politics.
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#IfIWereTedCruz I'd release a sex tape called "The Cruz Missile" and then try to marry a talented hip-hop artist.
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#IfIWereTedCruz I will first win local fancy dress competition for age group under 10. Then I will see my chances in politics.
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'@JohnFPLane That's a point ... assuming he still had one! #ifiweretedcruz Perhaps he'll have #Jesus Diapers so he can walk in his own water?'
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#IfIWereTedCruz I will first win local fancy dress competition for age group under 10. Then I will see my chances in politics.
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#IfIWereTedCruz, I'd be listening to uplifting 80s movie soundtracks to strengthen my resolve ready for returning to school on Monday.
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#IfIWereTedCruz, I would have pinned my wife after executing such a devastating elbow. Might as well try to win at something. Anything.
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#IfIWereTedCruz I'd of just stuck with being a serial killer and left the political environment long ago.
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#IfIWereTedCruz I'd practice saying, "I love women writers! Especially the ones who -- umm -- write about marriage. And stuff."
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#IfIWereTedCruz I'd move to the UK. We'll have any old loser run our country over here.
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#IfIWereTedCruz I would have a female lookalike. We could make an indian movie about lost relatives and become rich https://t.co/8bkBT2Nxl8
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#IfIWereTedCruz I'd say any publicity is good publicity coz now I'm famous as f*ck!
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#IfIWereTedCruz I'd go on a talk show and jump up and down repeatedly on a couch. Worked for Tom.
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