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378 tweets using #aspresidentiwill (page 9 of 13)
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#AsPresidentIWill double the tax on luxury yachts, fancy condos and horrible music and halve the tax on alcohol and lottery winnings
United States
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#AsPresidentIWill spend more money building schools than building prisons.
United States
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#AsPresidentIWill disappoint those around me with my lackluster performance. Whatever.
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#AsPresidentIWill attempt to appoint highly respected impartial expert advisors on my weak points. They'd have to be willing to work free.
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#AsPresidentIWill supply Darryl with unlimited rocket launchers. #TheWalkingDead
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#AsPresidentIWill pass a law that prohibits movie stars or billionaires from running for President.
United States
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#AsPresidentIWill do stuff in the Oval Office that hopefully nobody will hear about. And all garments will be sent to the in-house cleaners
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#AsPresidentIWill make sure every day is free cannabis and taco day.
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#AsPresidentIWill destroy the world
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#AsPresidentIWill I will BAN country music. Just kidding! (issues executive order quietly on a Friday night)
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#AsPresidentIWill provide subsidies to create more rock drummers and issue an executive order making bass players cooler.
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#AsPresidentIWill change the names of the states
United States
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#AsPresidentIWill fire all the cops!
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#AsPresidentIWill disperse the income of anybody who complains about income inequality
United States
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