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916 tweets using #IfIWereYourMom (page 9 of 31)
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#IfIWereYourMom I'd be cool, & let your friends come over to drink. Then I'd drink everything when you lightweights gave up
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#IfIWereYourMom I'd shave your stupid beard. It makes you look homeless.
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#IfIWereYourMom u wouldn't be blamed for posting my Instagram photos in a bikini https://t.co/8hQW13s5Wa
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#IfIWereYourMom, seeing as I'm currently a man, I think I would be Bruce/Caitlyn Jenner!
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#IfIWereYourMom I'd shave your stupid beard. It makes you look homeless.
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#IfIWereYourMom your friends would make fun of you. "your mom's got a beard" "your mom has big boobies" "your mom makes out with my mom" etc
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#IfIWereYourMom I'd be cool, & let your friends come over to drink. Then I'd drink everything when you lightweights gave up
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#IfIWereYourMom, seeing as I'm currently a man, I think I would be Bruce/Caitlyn Jenner!
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#IfIWereYourMom I would let you drink a little wine at holiday meals.
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I'm following people based on how fucked up their #IfIWereYourMom tweets are. ���
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#IfIWereYourMom I couldn't be your Dad. So simple even a caveman can understand it. . https://t.co/tVzhvWRxhN
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#Ifiwereyourmom i'd tell you to research Clinton's past. Since she laughed about getting a child rapist's charges dropped.
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#IfIWereYourMom I'd wonder how I got that extra kid without noticing.
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#IfIWereYourMom then ya Mum is now a pole dancer...money for them text books
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#IfIWereYourMom I'd be the coolest chick in the school drop off line.
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#IfIWereYourMom you won't need a GPS. I was able to hit your Dad's girlfriend once based on my instinct of navigation.
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I'm following people based on how fucked up their #IfIWereYourMom tweets are. ���
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#IfIWereYourMom I would say your mouth closed is your best feature #MothersDay https://t.co/3KGIcgdBeo
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#IfIWereYourMom I would say your mouth closed is your best feature #MothersDay https://t.co/3KGIcgdBeo
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#IfIWereYourMom I'd be the coolest chick in the school drop off line.
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