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583 tweets using #HowToEscapeADate (page 17 of 20)

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@meggieoneil   ·  13 Feb 2017
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#HowToEscapeADate if your date is a Trump supporter say you help illegals cross the border https://t.co/EMAX3ZxEZY
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@lughhalley   ·  13 Feb 2017
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Tell him you never shave Everywhere #HowToEscapeADate
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@meggieoneil   ·  13 Feb 2017
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#HowToEscapeADate get her name tattooed on your butt and show her
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@lughhalley   ·  13 Feb 2017
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My chicken has got the dentist.. #HowToEscapeADate
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@meggieoneil   ·  13 Feb 2017
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#HowToEscapeADate do you mind that I have a criminal record for abduction.
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@meggieoneil   ·  13 Feb 2017
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Give them your friend's phone number #HOWTOESCAPEADATE
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@lughhalley   ·  13 Feb 2017
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#HowToEscapeADate ask if your date wanna see your future kids pictures
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@meggieoneil   ·  13 Feb 2017
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#HowToEscapeADate I'm admin on 9gag
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@lughhalley   ·  13 Feb 2017
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"I need to feed my cats"! #HowToEscapeADate https://t.co/jd70SqfKBb
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@lughhalley   ·  13 Feb 2017
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Propose to him. #HowToEscapeADate
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@meggieoneil   ·  13 Feb 2017
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#HowToEscapeADate ask if your date wanna see your future kids pictures
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@tess_snider   ·  13 Feb 2017
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#HowToEscapeADate do you like rape jokes. Also how old is daughter
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@tess_snider   ·  13 Feb 2017
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#HowToEscapeADate Tell them you're actually looking for a blood donor
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@tess_snider   ·  13 Feb 2017
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#HowToEscapeADate faking a stroke has worked well for me
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@tess_snider   ·  13 Feb 2017
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#HowToEscapeADate Ask them if they're interested in God and invite them to your church.
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@tess_snider   ·  13 Feb 2017
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My chicken has got the dentist.. #HowToEscapeADate
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@tess_snider   ·  13 Feb 2017
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#HowToEscapeADate Turn up in a wedding dress.
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@tess_snider   ·  13 Feb 2017
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Make weird faces #HowToEscapeADate https://t.co/bUH1VKmeoG
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@worldofhashtags   ·  13 Feb 2017
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Ask him if he's good at math, and if he says yes pull your tax forms out of your purse #HowToEscapeADate
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@tess_snider   ·  13 Feb 2017
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Ask them to look after your leather gloves, rope and switchblade while you nip to the toilet. #HowToEscapeADate
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@worldofhashtags   ·  13 Feb 2017
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Saying I'm a Yelp reviewer #HowToEscapeADate https://t.co/7wDfzOZbtd
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@tess_snider   ·  13 Feb 2017
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#HowToEscapeADate 1. Get up 2. Say nothing 3. Walk away 4. Never go back 5. Delete/block 6. Find a new date 7. Repeat
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@worldofhashtags   ·  13 Feb 2017
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#HowToEscapeADate Me: You do not look like your tinder profile Me: *leaves*
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@tess_snider   ·  13 Feb 2017
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Invite your crazy ex in the same restaurant #HowToEscapeADate https://t.co/4DAtGeSFUB
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@jenn_abrams   ·  13 Feb 2017
Tell him that you're getting a degree in feminist dance therapy and that shaving is patriarchal oppression #HowToEscapeADate https://t.co/rsujxlBwau
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@ilikebigbuttand   ·  13 Feb 2017
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Ask them to look after your leather gloves, rope and switchblade while you nip to the toilet. #HowToEscapeADate
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@ilikebigbuttand   ·  13 Feb 2017
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#HowToEscapeADate just say three simple words "I'm a Scientologist"
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@ilikebigbuttand   ·  13 Feb 2017
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#HowToEscapeADate Find out who she voted for and then start praising the other one.
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@ilikebigbuttand   ·  13 Feb 2017
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Propose to him. #HowToEscapeADate
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@ilikebigbuttand   ·  13 Feb 2017
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Start a setence with "When I dated my cousin..." #HowToEscapeADate
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