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1,091 tweets using #reallifemagicspells (page 9 of 37)
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#RealLifeMagicSpells "I'm almost asleep' - makes people believe you're almost asleep while you're watching tv shows and eating pizza
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#RealLifeMagicSpells Hey, little boy, want some candy? Used by bad people to make headlines in local newspapers
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#RealLifeMagicSpells "I'm with her." Instantly transforms the ignorant into sheep.
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Electoral Collegio! Suddenly you win when more people voted for someone else. #RealLifeMagicSpells
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#RealLifeMagicSpells Abracadabra! ... no Hocus Po... no Rapple-Dapp.... no *wiggles nose ... nope. Oh. Wait. Bring-It-In-Y'all ! https://t.co/NlZdU3pFLe
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#RealLifeMagicSpells Orgasmus Massimus - gives a guy a second chance
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Taking you furniture shopping will magically make you want to fuck me. #RealLifeMagicSpells
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Dragonus Breathii Mouthwashica - for when that other person's breath is singeing your nose hairs. #RealLifeMagicSpells
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#RealLifeMagicSpells 'If you ask my opinion…" - self-involved asshole detection spell
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#RealLifeMagicSpells "I'm with her." Instantly transforms the ignorant into sheep.
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Double, double toil and trouble; (I'm too lazy to shave so...) Begone itchy stubble! #reallifemagicspells
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#RealLifeMagicSpells "I Just Have To Park Then I'll Be Right Up" reminds everyone from 30 adjoining blocks they must run errands on yours
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"Free guacamole" is a rarely heard spell that alleviates much stress #RealLifeMagicSpells
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#RealLifeMagicSpells D-cupus - makes your opinion more valuable *works only with hetero males
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#RealLifeMagicSpells Pussius Grabbus - Makes liberals literally shake
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"Expelmyanus!" (the perfect spell for constipated mornings) #RealLifeMagicSpells
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"rhince priebus" banishes principles and opens the most expedient path to power #RealLifeMagicSpells @midnight
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#RealLifeMagicSpells Whenever my wife ask me to make her a coffee I say "Poof, youre a Coffee" It never works & she fails to see the humor
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#RealLifeMagicSpells "New studies shows that..." and...VOILA, every1 will believe EVERYTHING u say, without question, as if u were an oracle
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#RealLifeMagicSpells "Hi, I'm Shedlon. How are you?" - makes all the women in the pub disappear
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#Reallifemagicspells Willpower. And an inability to give up, but that might be more like a burden or curse really!
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