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1,381 tweets using #survivalguidetothanksgiving (page 46 of 47)
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Remember that if any of the "5 single friends for you" like me on the day I eat the most, they're keepers. #SurvivalGuideToThanksgiving
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#SurvivalGuideToThanksgiving remind my dad to bring condescension, mom - her disappointment, me - Xanax
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Just focus on how good the good is. Think of all the surrounding noises as Charlie Brown's parents #SurvivalGuideToThanksgiving
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#SurvivalGuideToThanksgiving Wear a cap that says 'Make silence golden again'.
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Stay away from turkeys and teddy bears, they are always first to get killed for their meat and stuffing. #SurvivalGuideToThanksgiving
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#SurvivalGuideToThanksgiving I'm confused is this for people or turkeys?
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Set your scale back ten pounds. 15 for porkies. #SurvivalGuideToThanksgiving
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#SurvivalGuideToThanksgiving keep your friends close, but your bottle of wine closer
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Just focus on how good the good is. Think of all the surrounding noises as Charlie Brown's parents #SurvivalGuideToThanksgiving
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#SurvivalGuideToThanksgiving Move it to October like Canada because you gotta do it all over again in 4 weeks for xmas
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My #SurvivalGuideToThanksgiving is pass out Armageddon scenario survival booklet during meal
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#SurvivalGuideToThanksgiving... don't do it. It's a trap to make you fat and show you the boring or angry side of those you love the most.
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Just keep reminding yourself that this is your life and you make your choices for yourself, not them. Be happy. #SurvivalGuideToThanksgiving
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#SurvivalGuideToThanksgiving If you're allergic to animals there definitely will be an animal. Be ready for this
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#SurvivalGuideToThanksgiving if you're cooking for people you hate remember you have all the power � https://t.co/oQMQDtcace
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Remember: mashed potatoes are just filler. Use what room you have for the important things. #SurvivalGuideToThanksgiving
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Oh yeah. Don't forget to make an spare (take home plate ) #SurvivalGuideToThanksgiving
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#SurvivalGuideToThanksgiving I'm confused is this for people or turkeys?
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